Category: Family

A Time Like This

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© jb katke

As my friend Jon would say, “What a woman!”

Only she wasn’t yet; possibly just a preteen.

Recently we joined family in Branson, Missouri attending the live production of Esther in the Sight and Sound Theater. The town offers more things to do and places to see than I can list; I will focus on Esther.

There are many ways we could identify with her. Hold that thought.

In her youth, Esther was an orphan, taken in by a cousin. She was well cared for, but what jumped out at me was her upbringing prior to being orphaned. At a young age, she was taught to depend upon her Creator.

Only the proverbial rug was pulled out from under her. The rules of the land hit home. It was back in the day of women having no say in their future that she was forced to enter into a beauty contest. I’m trying not to spoil this true story that sounds unbelievable.

Given six months to prepare for the winning, I envision every Mary Kay and Avon lady entering the scene selling their products. Likewise with the jewelers hoping to make a profit at beaty enhancement. Dieticians may have been part of the mix, advising which foods will provide the sexiest figure.

Times were changing fast, no thanks to a foolish king and his advisors. Power, jealousy and hatred reigned in the palace, headquarters for how the people of the nation will live. Murder was an undercurrent in those who served the powers that be.

Maybe this story impacted me because of our recent Fathers’ Day. How the teaching from her parents who were no more played out in her circumstances. One line was all it took to make a difference in my life so I will share it with you. It’s not verbatim but as I remember it.

“Perhaps this is why you are here, for such a time as this.”

Young Esther made a difference, not just in her own life but the life of her people, her nation as a whole. She did all she could do. All she could do was have a conversation with her Creator, and if she died, then so be it.

She prayed the prayer that cannot fail. It’s not common knowledge what that prayer is, so I will tell you. Ask that events would be in accordance with the Creators’ will.

I’m here to tell you that takes guts. How many things occur in our lives that we have no control of? Yet to tell the Creator of the Universe that the results will be okay with us?

It takes more than guts. It takes faith and trust in a loving Creator. That can be hard to fathom if the father you know on earth is anything but loving. The Father in heaven is just that and more. He provides in ways beyond comprehension. Just ask Esther.

Don’t take my word. Read all about it in the Good Book.

Oh! One more thing. When you read it, note that no where in her story is the mention of God. Yet he was with her in the middle of her circumstances. Just like he is involved in your life, even if there is no mention of him.

Because of that, you can make a difference in the world around you.

The Best Plan

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© jb katke

Do you ever feel as though you are wandering aimlessly through life? I’ve been there.

It’s important to me that you know where there is breath, there is always hope.

Should you feel like you have no control of things around you, I must agree. But perspective makes all the difference in the world.

In my book, One Day Wonders, Ordinary Days Becoming Extraordinary each page reveals an event in my life where Jesus intervened unbeknownst to me at the time. It was an eye-opener. Never imagining to write; yes even this blog amazes me, my days have become purposeful.

One after the other, experiences came to mind; stories to share from  supposedly a nobody. Who would care? Maybe you.

I snapped this picture while on an outing with family. Watching it for a few minutes, the boat did seem to be drifting aimlessly. Actually, it was a fisherman, moving from one fishing hole to another. Seeking fish that would take the bait.

The day was mild, the water calm. Nothing remarkable going on here. Life can be like that, just going through the status quo of a normal day.

How can we know what lies ahead? 

Upon purchasing our first home, a (not so) mobile home; never imagining we would be selling it nine months after sealing the deal. The draft can do that to newlyweds. Only to find years later, Dave didn’t have to enlist, his draft number never came up.

An employer from my past; after seeing my multiple residences exclaimed, “Good heavens, I’ve hired a gypsy!” Not really, just a wife that follows her Navy husband to his military installations.

We tried hard to get pregnant; I resigned us to be childless. It was then that we realized we would be a family after all.

After purchasing a home (without wheels) we figured living there five years, fixing it up and move upwards to a nicer place. Our planned garage instead became a second child. Improving the curb appeal was replaced by a third child.

Ya just never know what life will put in your path. See what I mean by the uselessness of plans? I hasten to say, we would not trade any of our children for what we imagined life would be.

Its what Jesus had in mind for us all along. His way is always the better way. More years than I care to tell you, I did not include him in my plans.

I know better now. Jesus gives purpose and hope to carry on, even when times get tough. Do not be deceived, just because he takes up residence in a heart, doesn’t mean everything will be lollipops and roses. But beyond a shadow of a doubt, he makes life bearable and way more interesting. 

Nobodies are among his favorite people; itching for you to take his hope bait and see what miracles he can do in and for you.

Dreaming

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© jb katke

Dreams can be a funny thing; mine are downright bizarre.

My man will attest to that after he heard about the one I had being on a game show. Let’s Make a Deal, if memory serves me right. The contestant had to vie for attention through some outlandish costume. All I can recall is having the opportunity to choose Door #1, Door #2, or Door #3. Having made my choice, I discovered I  won seven tons of cat food.

This was before we were married and I only had one cat. Nevertheless, I earned the reputation for crazy dreams.

The one I had last night might rank up there with the cat food.

My son, Jamie, sent me a birthday card. The was the message:

Gu bib,

Hidt qumye yi qudg ti0 u gu[[t n94ygeut.

9 yg9m; iv ti0 cxc4t eut ume q9dg qc p9xce wpidc4 yi6cygc4.

9 /9dd ti0 ume gi[c ti0 jmiq 9 pixc ti0 di /0wg.

Jamie

Gibberish to you? Me too, that’s what woke me up. On the outside, I was sleeping, my dream laughter woke me.

Mothers can read between the lines.  

Jamies’ alleged message said: Hi Mom, Just wanted to wish you a happy birthday. I think of you every day and wish we lived closer together. I miss you and hope you know I love you so much. Jamie

I’m confident enough of these words to comprehend this is Jamies’ thought. I know my boy.

The hilarious part is it is no where near my birthday. Nor is it close to his; to prompt me of sending a birthday greeting to him.

What brings these thoughts to a sleeping mind? I’ve read of folks back in the Bible times that could interpret dreams. If one of you readers can, never mind interpreting mine, I may not want to know.

Whether your dreams are of a sleep nature or physical vacation plans for the summer, I hope they bring as many smiles and happiness as mine did.

Reflection Time

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© jb katke

Did you miss me? Last week I neglected to post a blog. Accidently on purpose.

I hadn’t forgotten, I just struggled to put into words what I wanted to say. Why? Because I couldn’t speak from experience. My aim is to share what I’ve come to know or experienced. It’s always real. I invite you to follow me, if you need a little hope or humor in your life.

That I can speak on.

This topic that didn’t come to be last week was something I only know exists. To write with any kind of knowledge I must give it due diligence in research or interview others. Time did not allow for that. At some future date I may give it the attention it deserves, but not now.

Sometimes silence is better than going off an untraveled road. Our world today is full of folks that take joy in sharing their opinion; whether asked or not. Uncontrolled words can get us in a heap of trouble. I grew up with the saying that ‘Silence is golden.’

This picture includes my reflection in the mirror behind me. That is too often the case with saying what is on our mind. It reflects who we are. Another saying goes like this, ‘One may look foolish; but opening their mouth removes all doubt.’ Some things are better left unsaid.

If only I could live by that!

Back when I had teenagers under my roof, one was giving me a little sass. The older one chastised her sibling, “Don’t you talk to mom like that!” Immediately, she whirled around saying, “Who said that?!

Are you ever surprised at what comes out of your mouth, wondering where that came from?

I look upon that day with fondness. Let it be said I got a fair amount of sass from both of them once in a while. What made the difference?

Motherhood. It changes our viewpoint, does it not?

I try to keep in mind what others have experienced that I have not. I don’t have to understand it. Just respect it, acknowledge that it is a reality.

This is why I appreciate you. My faithful followers let me elaborate what having faith in Jesus is to me.  It’s a reality that is so good that I wish it for others. The problem is I cannot coerce anyone to take that step forward. Ya gotta want it for yourself.

Spoiler alert: Life with Jesus brings change, but not as one might expect. What we look upon as bad things, may still happen. The difference is our response. To trust is to experience Jesus making the hard things bearable. I used to wallow in my sorrow. Now I tend to look not only for the good, but what I can learn from the experience.

One portion of the good news is people who have suffered have the most potential to ease life experiences for those around them. It’s a Jesus thing that begs to be shared because there is so much more to be had.

A Colanders Life

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© jb katke

My thoughts today are trite and realize not everyone can identify with these words. I guess with Mothers’ Day coming up it takes me back to my pre-mom days.

Back in the dark ages of my engagement, brides used to register for items needed to set up housekeeping. The only store that offered that service was our then upscale JL Hudson department store. It was a time when bridal showers were a popular thing. Do they even exist anymore?

Today brides can register at stores that carry all manner of things. A wish list may comprise of camping gear, all the way to tires for the car. How exciting is that?!

My list was focused on linens, cookware, and all variety of setting up housekeeping. Among my selections was a stainless-steel colander. Grandma Andrews considered that an over-the-top request when one could easily pick up a plastic one at the local discount store. Why she thought that was unreasonable I don’t know; her daughter, my Aunt Jane shopped there all the time.

I was gifted with the colander and am pleased to tell you it is with me as I speak. Grandmas’ colander didn’t stand the test of time as it was in the early days of plastic and melted from getting too close to the heat. Mine may show a few scratches but is working as good as the day I got it.

If it could talk, it would tell you of all our family moves. Starting out in our first home, a 12×60 mobile home, heading south to the mud flat duplex that we obtained by default. Back north to a couple military apartments that were converted barracks, returning to our home state for several years. Only to move south again to a few residences in Kansas.

That speaks only of the housing. It was there to welcome all three of our children; never complaining about moving over to make room for a bottle sterilizer and food mill to make homemade baby food. She watched those little ones of mine grow up. She was sitting on the counter witnessing our sons’ face getting washed by an overjoyed pup so happy her boy was home from his paper route.

She was on call if our 8-yr old needed her as she and a friend tackled making chocolate chip cookies by themselves. Unneeded but available just the same. Our family colander sat in on the conversation of our youngest learning that Santa Claus was really we parents providing Christmas gifts for the children we love.

Today our colander has a sibling, a smaller rendition, also stainless steel,  that fits our lifestyle now that we are empty-nesters. Time marches on, circumstances change and our needs are not the same. I’m just passing through this life, enroute to my forever home.

In the future our family colanders may move to one of the kids homes, or maybe the home of our grandchildren. It makes me realize that all the things that fill our home, essential as they may be at the time, will no longer be needed. Children beware, these colanders are just the tip of the iceberg!

Happy Mothers’ Day to mothers everywhere! Enjoy what you have today, even if your littles tend to be as messy as mine were. Jesus will be there giving you the patience required to train up these adults-in-training. This is my way of saying the day will come when you miss them and look back with fond memories of what all they put you though. Momma, you are a survivor!

Mom

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© jb katke

My assignment is nearly complete. I will confess it wasn’t an easy one.

My son requested I write about my mother. She died when he was a young boy. The task brings up memories, some that had been long forgotten. Others tended to be painful, only because it put me in a bad light. I suppose that cannot be helped, and chose not to add those to her memoir.

As a daughter, everything is written through my eyes. The memories bring twenty-twenty hindsight of an immature child. Today I know better than to say and do what I did then.

Mom did the best she could without access to child psychologists or You Tube to come to her aid. She never held an infant in her arms until my brother was born. Being the firstborn, he broke the ice of motherhood. Although, probably nothing could have probably prepared her for me. Don’t you find it interesting how different siblings can be while having the same parents, growing up with the same experiences together?  

As I wrote, my mind traveled back to those last days of her life. Reliving them, watching her weaken as time went by. Mom passed away at the ripe old age of sixty-one. By todays standard, that’s young.

We are about to celebrate the mothers in our life. It used to be we only had one, and in some cases, still is. But the adopted child is doubly blessed; born in the womb by one, and in the heart of another. Both equally vital. Then there are step mothers that have to outlive the stigma of being evil. Not all of them are you know.

Let’s not forget our mother-in-law. Mine was a keeper. She raised the man I fell in love with and married. Have you ever thanked yours for your man? I did and would recommend doing it, your words will be much appreciated. It’s not easy building a little boy into a loving, responsible husband. Particularly if yours is a single mom, trying to fill the role of two parents. I haven’t forgotten we are honoring mothers today, but there is much to be said for a dad in the house too; setting a manly example.

All this to say I salute you mothers. Wear you badge proudly. It’s unfortunate that with our badges come tired eyes, thunder thighs, saggy breasts, and varicose veins. Oh yes, wrinkles too. It’s okay, you have earned them all through years of service and self-sacrifice.

Keep in mind, Jesus doesn’t make mistakes, not with the children under your roof, not your appearance. Both of them give us something to work with. Yes?

The Last Kiss

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We never know when the last kiss will happen.

Daves text read: “Had an accident this morning. Everyone is fine. Have to go for a drug test now. Not sure what happens the rest of the day. Made a left at a 4-way-stop and a girl broadside me.”

Our day had started like every other workday, lumbering out of bed, still full of sleep. Breakfast made and a kiss as Dave went out the door. Only I was a mess the rest of the morning, waiting for a phone call.

His job requires driving a company car. Protocol dictates his next step. Accidents happen. That’s why they are called accidents, it’s unintentional, otherwise they would be referred to as normals.

Have you been there? To know how I felt?

This is why I rise at o-dark-thirty. To see him. To get what may at any given day be my last kiss. My mind took me places none of us care to be.

His student passengers were unharmed. To his credit he remained calm and collected. A later report from one of his colleagues confirmed his level-headedness kept the students from panic.

Have you experienced that last kiss? Need I mention the emotion of sending your beloved police officer or fire-fighter off to another workday?

Never underestimate a goodbye kiss. There is more meaning packed into it than the passionate ones.

It says I love you… I will miss you while you are gone…Thank you for your work ethic…You make our lives more comfortable…I appreciate you…Be safe…I look forward to your return tonight.

God willing, and he did, my loved one returned home from just another day of work that included an accident. Jesus is always with you too.

All Things (K)New

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© jb katke

Have you noticed the change?

No perhaps not. You have not been aware of the tan walls in my writing room, they are blue now.

The change makes me feel like the outdoors has entered in bringing fresh air inside. It renews the spirit, making me anticipate impactful words coming out of my keyboard.

Why can’t I feel that specialness every day? Each one is unique and cannot be repeated. No doubt, it is because of so much ordinary going on.

There is work to be done, schedules to keep, appointments made, and obligations. The list is endless. Too many ‘to-dos’ drown out the extraordinary moments. If you are like me, I make mental notes but then forget to remember them.

I have similar moments when in church. Not everyone would be in agreement with me. A relative once told me, “I can’t go to church when I see so many hypocrites there.”

Duly noted. But rather than point fingers, I see folks like me, that screw up from time-to-time. Bloopers happen.

Hypocrites are aware of their words and actions. Whereas a Jesus follower can forget their humanness. Letting poor company plant a bad seed in the mind, allowing it to ooze into the heart where it eventually spills out of the mouth. It benefits no one.

It happens to the best of us. That is why church-going is priceless. I need a reminder that Jesus sees me for who I really am. He knows I’m gonna screw up once in a while. That is the reason behind his death on a cross. To forgive.

It’s all about redeeming and making new. His forgiveness brings fresh air into a life. The spirit is renewed and feels energized to make each day count for something. The change happens inside, but is visible outside.

Fred Returns

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© jb katke

There comes a time when ya gotta give up. We named him Fred.

He’s back. I posted about him in the Near Surrender To Fred blog. We are now in our second year of hosting Fred. Uninvited I might add.

We have had the annoyance of a cowbird seeing it’s reflection in our window. Fred demands mating with it and will not take no for an answer. He ignores his female counterpart at the feeder.

The screens came down to protect them from damage. Fred now has free access to perching on our window sill with frequent body slams trying to get at its reflection. One would think he would get the hint or knock himself silly.

Covering the window with aluminum foil, we thought the shiny surface would deter it him becoming a nuisance. No such luck. Swapping the aluminum foil with cardboard was considered, but talked ourselves out of it. To be effective, it should be placed outside the window where the spring rains would make a mess of it.

Either way, our vision outdoors was blocked. What really angers me is Fred is keeping the humming birds away. I have worked hard at drawing them, all to no avail now.

Anger is putting it nicely; I want to kill him. Wouldn’t you know, Jesus had something to say about a birds.

Not even a sparrow, worth only half a penny, can fall to the ground without your Father knowing it. (Matthew 10:29 NLT)

I bet that applies to cowbirds too, so murder is out of the question. That blasted bird is holding us captive.  On our pleasant days we have been unable to open windows for the lack of screens.

Dave has done a little research and learned a further reason to hate Fred. Cowbirds lays eggs in other bird’s nest. If the home-owning bird returns home to find foreign eggs, it kicks them out. The next time it leaves the nest, that ornery cowbird kicks out the homeowners eggs. Talk about squatters taking over, I have nothing nice to say about him.

In the past, I have wished to learn the various bird calls to know who is ‘singing.’ I have learned the cowbird; he is still lurking about. Any ounce of Christianity I have is quickly evaporating.

Until I continued to read what Jesus has to say about people v birds.

So don’t be afraid; you are more valuable to him than a whole flock of sparrows.            (Matthew 10:31)

Clearly Fred knows enough scripture to not fear the evil intent of my heart. As a last resort, we have placed a wood owl wall-hanging Dave made in our window. Fred seems to be keeping his distance now. That was then, now he charges the owl, daring it to a duel.

Perhaps I should be content that the good Lord values me above a bird, regardless of my heart. It almost makes me want to surrender my anger to play nice to this creature God created. After all, it is people that God created to be his own image, not some birdbrain.

Last years words remain true, I still dislike him. Forgetting the aluminum foil of last year didn’t work, I once again suggested it to Dave. Not to mention that it would likewise keep the humming birds away as well.

As we talked the situation through, I mentioned if we had dark screens, Fred might not see himself. With that, Dave disappeared. I guessed our conversation was over.

Unbeknownst to me, Dave had some dark screen in his shop. He swapped out the screen with the dark one, and voila, Fred quit body slamming the window!

Problem solved. I hope.

The How of Jesus

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© jb katke

Easter season has arrived, putting us in the middle of what is known as Holy Week.

Does your week feel holy? Mine doesn’t either. But a lot went on, oh so many years ago.

We know it’s not another day in Paradise. A Paradise that once was. It can make one pause, wondering what happened?

Evil entered the scene. You and I have seen a lot of that and possibly been a part of wrongdoing.  Because God is holy, and cannot dwell with sin, he left our planet.

I can assure you Easter is not about the coloring of eggs or hiding them. Nor a bunny. Last week my blog, Marital Death, featured the why of Jesus. Today I ponder the how of Jesus.

He and his dad could be considered a mystery were it not for the Good Book. Because our finite minds cannot grasp all the info his book carries, some things remain a mystery. Like the son Jesus, the father God, and Holy Spirit all being One Person. From cover-to-cover God reveals himself, speaks of creation, zeros in on people groups, moving on to families and their foibles. He continues covering religious scholars and sending his son to earth on a mission.

That mission was when things turned ugly. Really ugly. Jesus was not well received by everyone. His words came across as outrageous, calling himself the Son of God. People were clinging to his message of hope, putting the religious leaders of that time into a snit.  He was perfect in every way; the religious scholars were not. They felt the man must be stopped.

By way of an unfair trial, mocked for who he claimed to be; defying him to save himself. Jesus endured a beating of leather straps with bone on the end tearing into his back. Thirty-nine lashes was the norm, just one short of what often brought death.

He was forced to carry his instrument for death, a cross, on his shredded back. His wrists and feet were nailed, yes, nailed to that cross. As if that wasn’t enough, observers watched as Jesus struggled to breathe; taking pleasure in his suffering.

But there were things that didn’t meet the eye. They did not see that Jesus endured this willingly- for them. For you and for me too. Jesus knew this day was coming, he knew what his mission was and the why of it. It was the only way to bring a forever life with God to the people he loved so much. Another thing that went unseen. Jesus carried the weight of all the sin this world has to offer.

Think on that. Jesus took the blame for all of it so that we wouldn’t have to suffer for the absence of God. How did he do it? I don’t like to suffer. It hurts, its hard. Why would anyone intentionally desire to suffer? Jesus holds mankind in high esteem, making it worth it all. More than worth it, necessary.

That isn’t the end of story. Gods’ will cannot be stopped. He didn’t stay dead; he rose from the grave; you might say he disappeared into thin air. Jesus had made a promise. That when he left the world he would send a helper, the Holy Spirit. That spirit gives us what we need. Hope, patience, perseverance and endurance to live like him.

Such as, believing this story which isn’t a story at all, it’s for real.   You can believe it just like you believe in the aforementioned egg. There is the shell, the yolk, and the egg white. Three in one. Just because you can’t visualize God doesn’t make him nonexistent. Gods’ presence is all around us; the harder we look, the more we see him. Consider the wind and waves of the ocean. We can’t explain where it comes from or where its going, but we feel it.

Nor is it by accident that we honor Jesus’ death in the spring. New life is showing itself  with trees budding and flowers breaking the earth. New life is the why and how of Jesus; he brings purpose and meaning to our life with an anticipation for a future with him. A new and improved you!

It’s about relationship. It means living in Paradise forever, with God, Jesus and a whole lot of folks that may have prayed for you. Lets’ face it, we all have heavy burdens to carry. That Holy Spirit strengthens us to keep on keeping on.

By the way, Jesus continues to love us.